Life in Blues...
There was a time when I used to love mornings and everything
about it; morning coffee, the smell of fresh air coming through the windows,
the will to start a new day with immense possibilities and so on! But as time
went by, mornings became solitary, a sense of foreboding set in; caffeine
became the only thing that could get me out from the bed and work became the
agenda of the day! I would hardly notice the breeze coming through the window
anymore. Although everything was perfect, just what I wanted, I still felt
something was missing like a piece from a puzzle...
As I immersed myself in my daily drudgery, hoping that I
ignore the missing piece or pretend that there was nothing amiss, my life took
special efforts to just drown me in its infinite void. Work was pretty much the
same, new teammates were to be trained in the process of our application. Some
were nice, some were cordial and one was distinct. I say distinct because he
felt like a breath of fresh air in my mundane life. He was fun, an outrageous
flirt and a downright fool! There was something about him which drew me to him...
He had a way with words. And he had a way with me!
As the days turned into weeks and weeks into months, he became
a necessity, a need from a want. You see I was trying to make him the “missing”
piece in my puzzle. I was trying too hard and I was trying too soon! I was
drowning and he pulled me up as a good Samaritan and that became his only
mistake. For I was taken by him, he added colors
to my life. And I thought to
myself, I cannot be falling for him... I have been here before... I have felt
this before... And I have trusted someone with my heart before and I was not
about to do it again.
I was walking in circles again. My heart was feeding me the
same shit again. And my brain was growing helpless again. I was alone and
lonely, there is a difference between the two as I have been told.
What do I say about love that has not been said before?
You go down the rabbit hole and disappear into the darkness coz
you have faith that someone would pull you out from there. What if there is no
one at the other end to pull you out? What if the hole is a bottomless abyss?
And you are just falling and falling into nothing!!!

Lucid train of thought. Well written.
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